Some protestor should've protested from home

Protestors are going to protest. There's always something out there people aren't happy with and they're going to show it with writing on a poster board. It's our God-given right in the great old U. S. of A.

However, it would be prudent to not show the world that you're a bleeping idiot and that there's a reason why there are stereotype jokes about your state!

Forrest Gump was right, "Mama always said, 'Stupid is as stupid does.'"

Phone conversation of a wife and husband

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Husband: [incredulously] Do you know what I have to do for Monday?

Wife: I don't care.

Husband: No really. Do you know what I have to do for Monday?

Wife: No really. I don't care.

Husband: Because you're a bitch!

Wife: Oh that's nice.

[a few minutes pass]

Wife: You should hear what I am writing to a couple of my students? It's pretty harsh.

Husband: I don't care.

Wife: Because you're a dick!

Husband: At least a dick has more usefulness than a bitch!

Wife: [sarcastically] Oh, that was funny.

Husband: Love ya!

Wife: Too!

∞
That's all I got to say about that!
 

Monogamy or Polygamy?

Is it wrong to be married and look at other women? How about wanting more than a look? How about a want and desire, even a sexual encounter?

Who says that this is wrong? The Bible? The church? The law? How was it that in ancient times there were some cultures that were polygamist and it didn't screw the whole world up? Or did it? Who the hell really knows?

It's tough for me to understand why people think we were created to be monogamist when there are so many beautiful women - and men if you like them - to chose from. Why is it that it's okay to buy yourself a car and trade up to a nicer, "younger" model before it dies but you can't do the same with a wife/husband without being looked upon badly? Isn't it all about having the newer, nicer model? Is it wrong to compare my wife to an automobile?

Now don't get me wrong. I love my wife dearly and think she is very beautiful. I made a vow to her and I will keep this vow. Not because of God or anyone else but because I made a promise to her that she would be my all, my everything! That's just the way I am. I give my word. I keep my word. Now, if she relinquished my leash and told me to go have fun, that's another story.

It just seems to me that there are too many "beautiful," wonderful and intelligent women/men in the world for it to be "normal" to want to be with one woman/man for the rest of your life. But most of us seem to follow this creed, including myself.

Oh well!

The wife is mad...so what!

Yep, the wife's mad at me. I think it has something to do with me calling her a retard. She was retarded. I wasn't being mean. I was being honest and truthful. I thought women wanted that. Anyway, it had something to do with our kids and how I reacted to something. I told her she was retarded and she took it more personal than she should have.

She told me later that evening that I was never "getting it again," just watch and see. It's been like a week. She's sticking to her guns so far. Too bad for her, I can masterbate. Ha! Sure, it's not the same...not even close...but it'll have to do.

Besides, to get back at her, I refuse to do anything she wants me to or anything I usually take care of like taking out the garbage, taking out the puppy, dinner, dishes, laundry, or packing (since we are going to move within the month to a new place).

So, YEAH! See how SHE likes it.

Loving household, isn't it?!

Trash without the trailer

This damn wickedly cold and rainy weather is putting a damper on my "husbandly" duties.

My damn wife is piling up on the trash. I have no freaking idea how she(we) can collect this amount of trash in a matter of a day and a half. The bag in the can I just put in there this morning.

Boy, do I look forward to the time we can launch our garbage into space. Those "save the earth" people can't bitch about littering in space, can they? In fact, we could launch shit into the stratosphere, have it re-enter earth's atmosphere and it incinerates. Global trash and litter problem solved!

Don't nobody be stealing my effing idea!

Just another day

I didn't get to go play tennis this morning. My wife gave me the guilt trip about "how I couldn't take one day out of playing tennis to go to a birthday party with my kids and to help her out with doing so."

So, tennis was pushed to the side and instead I skated for two hours. Yep, it was a skating party. I guess I got some exercise and the kids enjoyed it a whole lot. The oldest is getting so good and the youngest is coming along nicely. The youngest still hangs on the wall a little but I keep telling her that it impedes her progress because it throws her balance off when she allows her hand/arm to lag behind her. Anyway, I'm sure anyone that has learned this way can get the exact visual.

After two hours of skating, we get home and the wife is going to go see a play with a friend. Okay, I can't play tennis but she can go to a play? How is that fair? According to her, her plans didn't coincide with the children's attendance at the birthday party. Point taken but I'll find something to get her back. LOL!

I had to drop her off at her friend's so I decided to go purchase some software she wanted. She'd be happy and surprised when she returned home. It's some kind of digital photo scrapbooking software that she thinks she wants to "play" around with. I'm sure it will fall to the wayside like the crocheting and walking on the treadmill she made such a big deal to buy. I guess this isn't so bad because it just takes up space on her computer and it is a little more convenient to do for her...as I said, I guess.

The kids weren't happy about going to the computer store but I made them realize that we take them to many places that we don't particularly like going because it's someplace they enjoy or want to visit. They are starting to act like the rich kids we live around. LOL! Anyway, they were happy about it once we got there because on the way out I let them by two things of candy or gum and I bought them their own soft drinks from a soda machine. I'm such a spoiler.

We got home and they were interested in blowing bubbles that they got from the birthday party on the patio. I told them that it was okay. They asked a little while later if they could go swimming. I really didn't feel like it because I really should have started my paper so I told them "maybe." They weren't too happy about that but they'd have to deal. I went into my closet and got on my swim trunks they bought me a few months or so ago with the wife. I came back to the patio door and asked them if they liked my swim shorts. They basically said "yeah, what's the big deal." I told them that I was going to test out my new trunks at the swimming pool but they could continue to play on the patio. They were like "well, why can't we go with you?" I'm sure they love it when I tease them. Anyway, we ended up going to the swimming pool for about two hours. They didn't want to leave but I told them that their mom would be home shortly and they needed to take a bath and I needed to start my paper (NOT!). It was a good time. They had fun. I had fun.

The wife got home and we just hung around the house. We were a little antsy but didn't have any real idea of where to go. So, we just hung around. Around 11:30 p.m, she went to bed and I went to play on my computer.

What a life, huh?

I really should have started my paper.

Damn, I'm tired

The title says it all but that's what I get for staying up late, getting up early and playing tennis for three hours for the first time in a long time.

I decided to play tennis today because it has been a long time since the last time. No, it is not because I am a lazy ass. I admit that. It is because I broke my middle toe on my right foot about 3-4 weeks ago doing something foolish that I won't bother to explain.

I've been playing roller hockey on my broken toe but it is different because the boot of the skate is solid and doesn't allow my foot to bend. My tennis shoes on the other hand allow this bending which is very uncomfortable and painful, at times.

Anyway, I've been bored on my Saturday morning because I've played tennis just about every Saturday (only missing here and there for various reasons) for the last 10+ years.

I used to play Sundays as well but my wife got pissy about all the time I had to myself on the weekend mornings to do what I wanted while she was home, all alone, with the kids not getting to do what she wanted to do. Wah! Wah! So, like the good, whipped husband I am, I caved and no longer play tennis on Sunday mornings. Of course, now I play roller hockey on Sunday evenings! Woohoo, for me!

Nah, really I stopped playing on Sundays because one of my friends goes to church so he isn't out there to play. The only reason it's important for him to be there is because I enjoy having the opportunity to peg him with a tennis ball when he's on the other side of the net. We're good friends, huh? It's all in fun. I would genuinely be concerned if I hurt him but, come on, it's a friggin' tennis ball. At most, he'll get a bruise.

Also, my wife wanted to be able to go to church. Now, my not being there didn't keep her from going on her own with the kids but that's the point...she wanted me to go with them as a "family." Holy crikees! Like my kids really care if I'm there or not. Not the point, really. Perception is the key. If I think it's important, they'll think it's important. I won't go into why I don't think it's entirely important. Save that for another blog entry, another day.

So, back to the tennis...It was enjoyable. I didn't push too hard like I wanted to and would have if I didn't have a good handle on my urges to run down a drop shot or a lob. Unfortunately, it started raining but not before I got to play for a few hours.

It was really refreshing to be able to be in the hot, humid air of Texas playing tennis. Ah, good times.