Thursday, August 31, 2006

Went to the Cowboys vs Vikings preseason game.

Went to the Cowboys vs Vikings preseason game. Here are some general pics...

Texas Stadium from parking lot view...


Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders




Inside Texas Stadium

Sunday, August 27, 2006

Lacey Chabert is grown up and hot

It was a little weird to think she was hot when she was much younger and on Party of Five but she's always been just as hot as Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Hockey is an amazing sport

Watch some of the videos here and you'll see why.

The new season starts up soon...can't wait.

I hope the Dallas Stars get their heads out of their asses this time!

Saturday, August 26, 2006

U.S. Open 2006 - A farewell to Andre Agassi

"The Legend" is finally retiring. I grew up watching Andre Agassi. He's my age so I kind of lived vicariously through him since I didn't have the money, contacts or know-how to take my tennis game to the next level. He'll be missed just like all the others that made tennis interesting for me like Bjorg, McEnroe, Connors, Cash, Wilander, Edberg, Lendl, Becker, Navratilova, Everett Lloyd, Sabitini, Graf, Seles and many others. So, heres's to you Agassi...maybe when I'm old, gray and retired I'll be watching your children play on the circuit.
Agassi Closes Out Career at U.S. Open

NEW YORK (AP) -- Beneath the stands of Arthur Ashe Stadium, 5-foot-tall posters of U.S. Open champions decorate the otherwise spartan hallways leading to the door Andre Agassi will step through to reach center court for the final time.

There, on a wall between photos of Pete Sampras and Andy Roddick, is a shot of Agassi from his 1994 triumph. His blond hair is long, his face is unshaven, his shirt's a loud purple, and his accessories include a pinkie ring, a dangling earring and a chain necklace, all gold. The getup says "rebel," and that was certainly his reputation for the first decade or so of his pro career.

The Agassi who will play in his last U.S. Open - indeed, his last tournament - looks quite different, from the bald pate on down. And his reputation has changed as much as his appearance.

He leaves the game as an elder statesman, not merely because he's 36, but also because of his success on the court and his demeanor and extensive charity work off it. Through all the in-the-public-eye parts of his personal life (Barbra Streisand; Brooke Shields; Steffi Graf) and ups and downs of his professional life (career Grand Slam; No. 1 in 1995; No. 141 in 1997; back to No. 1 in 1999), he's been one of tennis' most dynamic and popular players.

Which is why, even though there are a myriad of intriguing plot lines to follow when play begins Monday at Flushing Meadows - Can Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal meet in a third consecutive Grand Slam final? Will Roddick thrive with new coach Jimmy Connors? Can Maria Sharapova win a second major title? Will Serena Williams, whose sister Venus withdrew with a wrist injury, shake off the rust of a six-month layoff? How will instant replay's Grand Slam debut go? - all eyes will be on Agassi.

It's why U.S. Tennis Association TV ads promoting the tournament feature him with the tagline, "The Legend." It's why the plan is to showcase him against Andrei Pavel of Romania in the only center court match Monday night, a person at the USTA told The Associated Press on condition of anonymity, because the schedule hasn't been officially announced.

All that, even though hardly anyone expects the unseeded Agassi and his troublesome back to leave New York with a Grand Slam title to add to the eight he already owns. Agassi included.

"I hope when I get back to the familiar sights and sounds of Arthur Ashe Stadium that something takes over," he said, "but I don't know what to expect. That's the part of it that's pretty hard to get my arms around."

He needs cortisone injections to deal with the pain and allow freedom of movement, and whatever soothing effects the shots provide last only weeks now instead of months. There's also the matter of match practice, of getting into a groove by facing top competition in a string of outings before a big event. He doesn't have the benefit of that, either, having pulled out of two events this month.

Still, it's quite clear that it's not about wins and losses at this point. It's about saying, "So long," for Agassi and for everyone else.

"There's a lot of great feelings associated with what I'm going through. There's real excitement. There's sadness in knowing that a big chapter of your life that you've poured yourself into is coming to a close, and there's excitement for the future, for the next stage, the next adventure," Agassi said.

"You're saying goodbye to a job, you're saying goodbye to people you've done it with, but you also are in position to take the next plunge in life. And, you know, I've just never done this before."

It's not surprising that Agassi himself, along with the USTA, TV executives and fans, would like to see him make one last good showing. Perhaps something akin to Connors' fist-pumping parade to the 1991 U.S. Open semifinals at age 39, considered so thrilling to this day that rain delays prompt producers to dust off the old footage.

But other players want Agassi to go out on a high, too.

"Oh, yeah, I would love to see him win many matches. That's the first thing I think every player looks at this time around: Who does Agassi play? Where is he in the draw?" two-time defending champion Federer said. "He's got a tough draw, there's no question. But I still hope he's going to have a good run like last year."

Agassi reached the 2005 final in what might very well turn out to have been his last hurrah, and it might have had a lingering effect this season. He took off months at a time, and he's played only 15 matches, winning eight.

At least everyone knows this is it for Agassi, who announced his retirement plans before Wimbledon. His great rival, Pete Sampras, didn't tell the world he was done until a full year after what turned out to be his last match, a victory over Agassi in the 2002 U.S. Open final.

By making his exit here, Agassi is coming full circle: His first major tournament was in New York as a 16-year-old in 1986. Two years later, he reached the Open's semifinals, and in 1992 he won his first Grand Slam title at Wimbledon. He would add U.S. Open titles in 1994 and 1999, four Australian Open titles and the 1999 French Open title, making him one of five men to win all four majors.

Somewhere along the way, the public's perception of him shifted from the punk in the "Image is Everything" advertising campaign he later distanced himself from to the "Father Knows Best" persona he enjoys now.

John McEnroe likens it to the metamorphosis undergone by boxer George Foreman, from feared fighter to roly-poly grill salesman.

"I played him when he was 16 or 17 and he had an energy to him then. He was excitable. I liked him then. He wasn't educated in the sense he went to college or high school, but he seemed to be an intelligent young guy, somebody who absorbed everything," said McEnroe, who won seven major titles. "I find it nonetheless amazing that he's made this transformation. There were times Andre had a chip on his shoulder. ... (Then) he dedicated himself to the sport, and he's become this incredible ambassador. We need to find a way to keep him around."

Agassi says he's not sure what his future holds, other than more family time with Graf and their two children. And he deflects questions about his legacy in the game.

Others, such as ATP chairman Etienne de Villiers, don't hesitate to assess Agassi's importance to tennis.

"There are certain guys you wish would go on forever. He'll be a huge, huge loss for the sport. Andre's got a great mind. He's got a great attitude. He gets it. He's a very, very, very smart guy. He's articulate. He's charismatic. Of course the sport will suffer," de Villiers said. "It's like when the NBA lost (Michael) Jordan: You can't replace people like that."


(click on article for official page on Tennis.com)

Our nation is so screwed with thoughts about illegal immigration like this

From DallasNews.com: FARMERS BRANCH – Holding signs that read "America was formed by immigrants" and draped in American flags, more than 300 protesters Saturday denounced a city proposal that would prohibit landlords from leasing to illegal immigrants.

The proposal by City Councilman Tim O'Hare would also make it tougher for illegal immigrants to work in the Dallas suburb, penalize businesses that employ undocumented workers and make English the city's official language.
(click on quote to link to actual page, may expire)

I'm not against LEGAL immigrants living in the neighborhood as long as they aren't delinquents nor am I against them working and taking jobs from anyone--that's just typical employer/employee strategy.

I am against ILLEGALs that are allowed to take housing that could go to someone else that has a right to be in the country or a taking a job someone else could take (whether they do or not) that is legally in the country. I think anyone that employs or houses illegals should be tremendously penalized and the illegal deported immediately. We waste too much time on due process and such for people who don't the rights that are extended to a naturalized citizen or permanent resident.

It's no different than harboring a fugitive from the law, aiding and abetting...blah, blah, blah.

You get the friggin' point! I hope.

DONE!

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Email humor 08/23/2006

In crowded Austin, Texas, at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman wearing a tight mini skirt was waiting for a bus.

As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. She tried to take the step only to discover that she couldn't.

So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, and for the second time attempted the step. Once again, much to her chagrin, she could not raise her leg.

With another little smile to the driver, she again reached behind her to unzip the skirt a little more, but again she was unable to take the step.

About this time, a large Texan standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus. She went ballistic, turned to the would-be Samaritan, and yelled, "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!!"

The Texan smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured we was friends.



I NEED YOUR HELP!

I'm trying to find out which Wal-Mart sells this mirror!!!

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Claire Forlani is hot...from an old post

Claire Forlani from "The Medallion" is a gorgeous actress. It's a pity we haven't see more...or less...of her.














Saturday, August 19, 2006

Sunburn? Brown people aren't supposed to sunburn!

It's not the best to see but my ass—not literally—got burned when I went to a local water park (NRH20) with the wife and kids. What about sunscreen you ask? Bah! Who needs sunscreen?! Obviously, I should have thought about that a little harder. I'm finally peeling today from it. Good times!



Friday, August 18, 2006

Email humor 08/18/2006

The top picture caption says...
In Amsterdam, the tile under Schipol's urinals would pass inspection in an operating room. But nobody notices. What everybody does notice is that each urinal has a fly in it.


The bottom picture caption says...

Look harder and the fly turns into the black outline of a fly, etched into the porcelain. It improves the aim. If a man sees a fly, he aims at it. Fly-in-urinal research found that etchings reduce spillage by 80%. It gives a guy something to think about. That's the perfect example of process control.

Who says you can't potty train a man?!

Thursday, August 17, 2006

I guess Paris Hilton can be hot

I was surfing the web and found this picture of Paris Hilton. She really doesn't look that bad here. It's quite amazing!

Email humor 08/17/2006

I don't know much about woodpeckers, so I don't have a clue as to what part of the country this picture of a GIANT woodpecker was taken. But, as far as woodpeckers, it's got to be the biggest on record!

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

The shit end of the stick

Last night was a very depressing night. Not depressing where I want to kill myself but depressing enough. I am destined to be on the shit-end of every stick. I guess it is partly due to my own fault. Well, this time it was anyway. Let me tell ya...

I went to play tennis out in Colleyville to meet my friend Keith around 6:15 p.m. I was off work and decided to head out there a little early to avoid traffic. I stopped by Mom and Dad’s just for a bit to see what my nephew, Robbie, called and left a message for on my cell phone. I couldn’t understand his mumbling ass.

Anyway, I stopped by for just a bit and then I left. David, my other nephew, asked for a ride, with his friend, to Wal-mart. I told him he’d have to find a way home because I was only going to take him because I had tennis plans.

On the way to dropping them off, I stopped by my brother Vern’s because I had a DVD of Adam’s (his son) to return which he left at my house when he spent the night. I figured this was a good opportunity to talk to him about buying his Explorer. Well, before I got the chance, he mentioned that James and James Michael (brother-in-law and his son, my nephew) had stopped by earlier that day to buy it. James made him the $2,500 offer Vern was going to get from CarMax and Vern agreed to it.

I told Vern that I was going to buy it from him. I just hadn’t had time to see him and talk to him about it. You can’t imagine how pissed, upset and just deflated I was after hearing that. I mean the Explorer isn’t anything spectacular but since Vern has had money he has taken much better care of his vehicles than when he was younger. If CarMax gave him an offer of $2,500, then I would think it was at least worth that much.

Two weeks ago Vern and his wife were over our house and talked about selling the Explorer. Marti (his wife) said she took it to CarMax to see how much they would give her. They told her that she could sell it on the street for like $4,500 but they were only going to buy it from her for $2,500. She was surprised they offered that much but was going to drop it off the day they left on their way out of town. I told her that I had $1,500 that I could give her right now. She laughed and so did Vern and said, “Why would I take $1,500 when I could get $2,500?” I said, “Hell, I was just offering.” I recall Marti saying she’d be willing sell it for less to a family member and depending on who that family member was but I guess she was just talking. I would think I would be the perfect, best and only family member worthy of them cutting a deal for.

So, after that evening, I couldn’t stop thinking about buying the Explorer. I thought about offering him $2,000 although I would go up to the $2,500 but what kind of sell would it be if we didn’t dicker on the price a little bit.

For days, my wife and I talked occasionally about it and she kept telling me to call Vern. It was like Wednesday last week and she mentioned that we should just offer him the $2500. I thought I had time and I told her that I would call him. I kept pushing it off and pushing it off (like a dip shit thinking I had all the time in the world). Finally, I thought I’d see him this past Sunday to play hockey but we ended up not playing. I should have called and talked to him then, but I didn’t.

Monday, me, my wife and kids went to NRH20 in North Richland Hills. I called James Michael on the way out to see if he wanted to go. He said he didn’t have any money but I told him I’d take care of it.

We were leaving NRH20 around 5 p.m. and as I started the van, the wife asked me again if I had called Vern. I told her not yet but I will. James Michael was in the van and heard our entire conversation. We drove to Chuck E Cheese’s down from NRH20 to eat and let the girls have some fun. I bought James Michael food and drink. I dropped James Michael off on the way home and, again, I should have called Vern but I didn’t.

I figured I had time.

So, we get to yesterday when I do see Vern and I find out what went down with James, James Michael and Vern.

Do you get the picture? James Michael knew I was looking to buy Vern’s Explorer. He’s been there EVERYTIME my wife and I talked about calling Vern and making the offer. So, it’s quite funny – not literally – that all of a sudden Tuesday afternoon James Michael calls Vern and tells him that his dad is on his way over to buy his truck and wanted to take it home THAT day!

Vern was saying shit like “ah, man” and “why didn’t you tell me before” and shit like that. I told him I had mentioned to him about it but I didn’t know about the extra money until a few days ago that the wife was getting in the mail that I could get him the full $2,500. I told him I should have called but I knew I was going to see him to make the offer face to face but obviously got undercut in time by James Michael and his dad.

Vern wanted me to call James Michael and try to pull on his heart strings to influence him to talk James out of buying it but James Michael knew his dad’s plan was to let him drive the Explorer. James told Vern that he was buying it for Tina (my sister) but fucking Tina doesn’t go anywhere. She sits on her ass all day playing MOHAA (Medal of Honor Allied Assault) and the other times she is fucking sleeping. James said their van is falling apart and he’s planning on trading it in and getting a new truck. So, I ask why does he need the Explorer? Just to fuck over Jay (me), that’s why. I think it's genetically coded in my family members to want to blatantly fuck over their siblings. I guess it's recessing in my body or my conscience is too strong.

You don’t understand how pissed I am. It’s unbelievable that James Michael wouldn’t have my back. Rather he fucked me over for his own gain. I expect it from my brothers and sisters but NEVER did I expect James Michael to fuck me over in such a way as this. I mean after all I’ve done for him, tried to do for him, and then he fucks me over. I mean he fucked me over in the past when he bailed out on helping us move when he told us he would be there. This is a little more – no way more – than not showing to help us move.

Of course, we could always say that it was my fault for not calling sooner and blah, blah, blah. But James Michael knew all the way up to the day he called Vern that I was going to offer Vern the money for his Explorer. He could have stepped up and said, “Dad, Uncle Jay really wants to buy it,” but he didn’t. In fact, you would think he would think it was really shitty that his father is willing to fuck over and undercut me like he did. I just can’t believe it. It makes me sick to my stomach to think about how much we have tried to help his worthless ass out and he screws me over...me!?

Then we look at Vern. Vern could have been a bigger man and stepped up as well and told James that he had already been in talks with me about the Explorer but didn’t realize I was serious. I tried to help him see that it isn’t that bad to bail out on the deal and sell it to me. I mean the Explorer is now on a destiny to be fucked up. Every freaking vehicle James and Tina have is fucked up, either by themselves or their selfish children. I told Vern that he knows it’s going to be driven to hell by James Michael but he wouldn’t call James and tell him he had already been in talks with me. I mean Vern wouldn’t even step up and help his own fucking brother - the one and ONLY family member that hasn't asked him for money or tried to screw him over. I understand he didn’t want to cause a riff but what the fuck should he care. First, he’s going to be in Florida. Is he really going to give a shit what the rest of the family fucks think of him back in Texas? Second, I’m his fucking little brother. James and Tina have already tried to fuck him over for $6,000 and who knows what else.

And yet, Vern went ahead and sold the Explorer to James this afternoon.

So, I’m destined to always get the shit end of the stick from my family. Hence, I have decided to excommunicate all the mother fuckers. I’m tired of getting shit on for nothing and not getting the respect I’m due for trying to help out the trailer trash scum mother fuckers! Even Vern...I cannot let go that he didn’t have his own brother’s back. He couldn’t do this ONE thing for his brother. He couldn’t do the RIGHT thing. James Michael couldn’t do the RIGHT thing, either. I’m sick and tired of it.

I have no reason to see these fuckers. I only got together with them for my kids. So, they could have a sense of family but do I really want them to have this kind of family? FUCK NO! They are better off joining a convent or something!

So, mark this day in the books. All friendly communication has been discontinued between me and my ENTIRE family excluding a one or two nieces or nephews that haven't crossed me yet. I have no desire to see these people nor speak to them. I’m done with it and the wife and I wipe our hands of them.

Well, it’s now late, about 12:13 a.m. I need to get to bed. I start my first class of the Fall 2006 semester tomorrow. It’s called “Contemporary Moral Problems”. How coincidental is that...I’m taking a class on moral problems?

Good night!

Monday, August 14, 2006

Chrissy Moran and Adrianna Sage - Rated PG13

Beaded curtains and girls in bikinis...

I'm a guy and, as such, I must occasionally post pictures of really hot chicks! These just happen to be porn stars which I'm sure every straight, horny bastard has seen in some for or fashion on the web if not in a movie. The pic really isn't that bad but still a nice angle.

So, here's to all the guys out there...

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Jelena Jankovic is hot!

I am watching WTA tennis...the JPMorgan Chase Open finals to be exact between Elena Dementieva and Jelena Jankovic. And I got to thinkin'...I don't know why Jelena Jankovic doesn't get as much press as Maria Sharapova. She's just as hot and just as good of a tennis player. Maybe she needs a better agent to get that extra money on the side from sponsorship like the other players do. Anyway, enjoy a few pictures of her here and decided for yourself on her hotness. They are from her website here.







Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Confucius says

As written on my fortune from my fortune cookie from the nearest Pei Wei:
For a good cause, wrongdoing may be virtuous
Does this mean that if I saw a hot chick jogging, hit her over the head and took advantage of her that my wrongdoing of knocking her out COULD be virtuous since it was for a good cause i.e. my sexual gratification?

Sweet, many good times ahead for me!

Delusional parasitosis

Only psychiatrists could come up with a word like this...

Delusional parasitosis is a psychosis in which sufferers believe they are infected with parasites. Often the patients have a real-life problem with scabies, lice, or some other tiny attackers, but then imagine they are continuing to plague them.

It sounds to me like these people are just a step away from being paranoid schyzophrenics.

Lock them all away on a small, remote island like Cuba.

Oh by the way check out the story from which I got this BIG word here as long as the link remains.

In the news 08/09/2006

Did you know that this is a "legal" way to kill your child? How many people have gotten off free and clear from the law for "accidentally" leaving their child in an overly hot car on an extremely hot day!? It's amazing, legal "child-cide".
(click on quote to link to story, may expire)
LINDALE, Texas - An infant was found dead in a hot, parked vehicle outside Lindale City Hall on Tuesday after being left inside by one of the town's reserve police officers, authorities said.
Again, I ask you religious types, how can a loving God allow this to happen? At five months old, why was this child made to suffer!?

I just don't understand.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Sunday, August 06, 2006

This dude has some big cajones

It's amazing to what extent some perverts will go to. I occasionally got to appreciate them.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Jenna Jameson immortalized in wax

I think her right boob is a little droopy. I don't think that's the way it looks normally so I'm thinking the wax must be melting from being next to "Her Hotness".

Thursday, August 03, 2006

Email humor 08/03/2006

I believe in these difficult and mean-spirited times in which we live there needs to be a message of hope. Just a single image that speaks to us of love, harmony, peace and joy. An image that suggests the universal brotherhood of man. I have found that image, and I ask that all of you take a moment to be inspired by it.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

We are destined to be infested with rodents or insects

A beehive has been constructed in my attic. I actually took this picture like a week and a half ago but just got around to posting it. My friend was over one weekend and happened to see something "leaking" from the eave of the roof down the front wall. I had my nephew climb up to touch the substance and my friend, Shawn, tasted it and said it was honey.

I climbed into the attic with my trusty flashlight. I was cautious to listen for buzzing but didn't hear any. I found the area that would be adjacent to the outside where it was leaking and move the insulation, slowly as to not stir any bees waiting in stealth mode for attacking.

This is what I saw...


It's like Amityville Horror.

The following Tuesday the exterminator came out to make sure the bees were dead and then returned on Friday to remove the hive because new bees will take over the hive if left in tact, not to mention the honey attracts ants, flies, and other insects.

It's crazy, man, crazy!

Who picked that guy to be the face of Six Flags

Remember that scary, bald, old man in the Six Flags commercials that would start dancing outside of that bus? Well, here he is up close and personal.



Needless to say, he's no longer their mascot.


Is there really a God?

Stories like this make me sick...see story here. (link may expire)

As a parent, I wonder how a loving God can allow this to happen. I know some will say that he is in a better place or the "maker" has called him back home or some religious bull-cocky statement but the fact of the matter is... this boy SUFFERED before he was "called back" to the almighty savior!

It wasn't instantaneous death or a vanishing like in the "Left Behind" movies.

He probably had some suffocation and then the heatstroke.

It's unforgivable for mortals. It should be unforgivable for Gods.

I'm not anti-God. I'm anti-suffering for the young and innocent.

I would be bitter if this happened to my kids. I'm not quite sure how someone wouldn't whether they are very religious or not. One should be able to be bitter about it.

Oh well. We live. We die. Why should I try to analyze it?

DONE!