Sunday, February 28, 2010

Are cheaters really that stupid?

I typed this a few weeks or so ago. It's a little after-the-fact but oh well...

My coworker is going through a divorce. It's been a year since she found out that her husband is a cheating fucker. He's been basically maintaining two relationships/households for at least 5 years. Funny thing is his "lover" looks very similar to his wife (my coworker and friend) but the wife is quite a bit prettier especially since she's lost a lot of weight (done pre-knowledge of the cheating).

Anyway, he's been trying to butter her up the past few days or so. He texted her that he's put some extra money in her bank account (they have an agreement until the divorce is agreed upon and finalized) and he prepaid her oil change last Thursday.

She knew something is up but didn't quite know what.

This morning she found out.

Apparently, the house he and the filthy whore (my coworker's term not mine) have been renting is foreclosing. The owners have been taking the rent checks but not depositing them and paying the mortgage.

Her husband wants to buy this house (it will probably be a good deal in this economy) but he needs his wife to sign a few dotted lines first. I'm sure it is so she approves and won't come after it as an asset of the still legal but otherwise destroyed marriage. He pleaded that he was only buying it for him (of course the whore benefits) and only his name would be on it. He continues to text that he has been good to her, giving her extra money and seeing to it that her needs are met (monetarily only of course for the house, car, etc.). He begs her to do this one thing for him and he needs it signed by end of day today.

WTF!?

She forwards to her lawyer and says jokingly she'll do it if he agrees to pay her $3,000 a month for 10 years. Her lawyer replies, "That's what I call hard bargaining." He also tells her he'll contact his lawyer to send over the paperwork to take a look at it.

She gets a text from her husband (soon to be ex) saying never mind because he'll just move and get a new lease somewhere. Which is obviously something he didn't want to do originally, and as the coworker put it, "I bet the filthy whore wanted the house and didn't want to move!"

To add to it, the youngest daughter says, "Mom, you're just being vindictive. You should just do it." If she were mine, she would be picking herself off the floor.

Does her mother not have the right to be vindictive? He's been cheating on her for at least 4-5 years. I would have told him to fork over $5,000 up front along with the $3,000/mo. Whether if I was a male or female and my spouse cheated on me, I'd be getting some sort of vindication!


Sent on the Super Jay Network from Super Jay's BlackBerry®


Friday, February 26, 2010

Texas Boll Weevil eradication Foundation, Inc.

I was processing an application received today for one of our graduate program. I just happened to see his employer listing. It said, "Texas Boll Weevil Eradication Foundation." My curiosity was peeked.

A quick Google and here is their home page. It's a real, tried and true, entity. I mean I didn't doubt that he worked somewhere but I just never thought something would be named after a pesky little insect. Apparently it's a big deal for a long time. Stupid bugs!

Whoda thunk it?



Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Oh where, oh where has Boner gone?

I don't mean to take his missing lightly but I just couldn't not try to say something funny when about to post about Boner (aka Andrew Koenig).

It's been such a long time since the show ended that I had forgotten but when I saw this article, it made me remember and smile. Hopefully he is okay but it seems like he had bigger issues.

On a lighter note, this makes me wonder if they have like a sidekicks web site. Something like "Whatever happened to" but with the not-so-mainstream actors.

People like Boner, or Vinnie, Henry, Joey and the like. You know, those that were "famous" because of the people they were on a show with not because of their own talents.

Anyway, hopefully Boner is just laying low and chillin' in Vancouver. Otherwise, so long Boner...enjoyed you while you were around. ;-P


U.S. Flag etiquette

I was just randomly thinking and a distinct thought popped into my head..."Is it really necessary or required to put your right hand over your heart during the U.S. National Anthem?"

It made me think of the stupid, annoying email chain letters that were going around about Obama "refusing to place his hand over his heart during the National Anthem." Granted he may have been ignorant and not realized that everything he did or didn't do was going to be scrutinized to the minute detail and blown up to enormous proportions but I never believed he outright refused! I just don't see his "people" letting him get away with blatantly stupid things like that because I don't doubt that some dip shit redneck would show him how "we 'mericans handle those folks who are anti-American types." There's always one in the crowd.

Anyway, Snopes kind of took care of that email chain letter here...pretty much. Enough for me since I wasn't actually there.

So, back to my search for the expected etiquette. I found something at USFlag.org flag etiquette which doesn't specifically say what civilians should do.

Then there's Wikipedia's version here that says some code was passed around 1998 that required the hand-over-the-heart.

And then Slate had a good article here pretty much saying the same as Wikipedia but the code was adopted earlier.

I guess I can come away with the knowledge that it's proper and somewhat required to put your right hand over your heart during the U.S. National Anthem.

Let it be known that I have always done this as I was brought up properly in regards to respect and the hand-over-heart has always been something I was taught to do. I was just curious if there was actual written etiquette.



Sunday, February 21, 2010

Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever (2009)

Just finished watching one of the most horrific shows I've seen...and I've seen A LOT! Funny thing is I really didn't like the first Cabin Fever. I can't remember a single thing about the first movie except I think there was a weird toilet scene but I could be wrong.

I didn't expect much but the sequel, Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever (2009), took the first movie and flushed it down that toilet scene. Besides the extremely weak acting and already-seen-too-many-times story line, the gore factor was occasionally gross but overall it was subpar. There was bloody vomits, bloody face/skull bashing and fingernail pulling, and some other "gore" stuff. The only good part was when they showed a girl topless...twice but it was the same girl. The bad part was that she was really small and the second viewing she had some nasty rash and pimple growth on them (that's the "fever"). There was an obese chick that got naked but they didn't ever show her, uh, rolls, boobs...not that I wanted to but it may have added to the gore factor.

Anyway, the movie ends without actually ending. The two "main" characters end up being captured by some group without a name or explanation and then the film turns to like an animated film showing how the "fever" is transferred from one person to another across city and state lines. End of movie.

FINAL VERDICT: Definitely pass! If you can, take all the copies off the shelves of the video store and use them as shooting practice targets.


Funny T-shirt print

Saw this on a friend's Facebook page. This is just a crop of the shirt but you get the gist. It's pretty amusing...to me at least.


In the news 02/21/2010

This was actually "in the news" a couple of days but just got around to mentioning something about it.

From Frontburner:
The Kids Today

We got a résumé today from someone who graduates in May. In the “skills” section, she listed “the Internet” and “e-mail.” I’m curious. Should I just assume that her skills also include “pen” and “paper”? And what about “the telephone”?

R.I.P. Phil Harris

Saw an article today about Phil Harris, one of the captains in Discovery Channel's Deadliest Catch show, passing on. While they last, good articles here and here.

I haven't seen the show in a while but I always enjoyed watching it when I did.

From watching the video in the first article, I'd say the oldest son has other aspirations and probably had a rough childhood living in his father's limelight (a light that was obviously there before the show). The youngest son seems like he always had something to prove to dear old pop.

I hope all works well with both of them. I'm not sure I'd want to endure the trials and tribulations of crab fishing. My hat is off to those that do.


Saturday, February 20, 2010

A Nutrisystem fail?

Got a paper today on my lawn. It had some ads in there for all kinds of shit. One that caught my eye was the photo at the right.

I'm not being condescending but I don't think the Nutrisystem system fully worked on Billie Jean King. I don't know when this photo of her was taken but I just saw her on the Australian Open broadcast on television and she wasn't anywhere close to looking like this picture. She looked like a very old and decrepit Elton John.

Anyway, I felt like I had to comment.

Isn't this a little hypocritical?


Sent on the Super Jay Network from Super Jay's BlackBerry®

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Lone Star Shipping Company

I had to drop off a package at an "authorized UPS shipping location" yesterday morning. I finally got around to getting a new return shipping label to send back the damage Nook I received a couple of weeks ago. I've been busy and the original label expired.

Anyway, I called this weekend and got a new one emailed to me. I promptly printed ad taped to the box with the damage Nook. I meant to mail it Tuesday but I got the closing times mixed up on this one store. It closed at 6pm instead of 9pm.

So, I found another location that's actually on my way to work. It said it opened at 8am whereas some other locations didn't open until 9am. This earlier time would work out better for me.

The name of this place is called The Lone Star Shipping Company (Google map location here). As you can see on the home page in big bold letters, it says, "Store Hours: Monday - Friday 8:00 to 6:00."

They lie!

I got there a little earlier than expected. It was about 7:50am. I waited outside in my vehicle until 8am. Nobody opened the doors. 8:10am. Still nobody opens the doors. 8:15am. A light comes on inside the building. 8:22am. The man opens the front door.

I walk into the place and he says, "What can I do for you?"

I felt like railing into him about how 8am means 8am, not fucking 8:22am! But I didn't.

I merely said, "I have a UPS return package I need to have sent."

He said, "I'll take it. And you're done!"

I said, "That's it?"

He said, "Yep!"

I felt like saying, "I fucking waited for almost thirty minutes for a barely two-second exchange?" But I didn't. I just said, "Thanks," and went on my merry way.

But I release my frustration here and tell you to not visit this location at 8am if you happen to be in the area and need to ship something.

I just don't understand the point of posting an opening time if you aren't going to adhere to it!


Live Long and Prosper!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Chik-fil-a coffee versus McDonald's coffee (pt 3)

To continue with my Chik-fil-A versus McDonald's coffee saga. I went to the Chik-fil-A web site and filled out a "comment" form. I knew they wouldn't really give a shit but I had to let them know my saga and opinion just to be able to say, "I tried." So...

MY MESSAGE TO THEM VIA A WEB FORM
Sent: 2/8/2010 02:02:52 PM
To: Chick-fil-A.Cares@na.ko.com
Subject: Chick-fil-A Web Form Message

According to the manager at this store, the coffee has changed. In my opinion (and my wife's), not for the better. She's decaf. I'm regular (w-cream). First, we noticed the change when they changed vendors. It literally tasted like heated dishwater. We chalked it up to a one-time bad batch. It happened 3-4 more times. Yes, we gave it that much of a chance to prove it was a fluke. We told manager. He mentioned the change in vendors.

A couple times later we were there for lunch and he recognized us. He said they found there was a problem with the machines and brew time or something. So, once again we tried it. It was still bad.

A few months later, another manager said they changed to the Columbian brew. Again, I gave it a try. It's not as bad as the dishwater taste before but it is no longer tasty and flavorful enough for me to spend the money. We used to go to McDonalds which was about 3 mins down the street until this Chikfila as it was basically across the street and had almost as good as coffee. The wife and I no longer purchase simply to sit back and enjoy the coffee in the dining room. Chikfila is now a drive-by dining experience (unless lunch/dinner with carbonated beverage) where we just get the 4-ct minis for the family on the way to school drop-off. We opt for brewing our own coffee (1 lb bag of Dunkin Donuts regular roast) or make the short trip to McDonalds. Their coffee was actually always better than yours but because your location was closer and the coffee was close, we made the visit to dine in with coffee almost a weekly affair. We'd like to return but my taste buds can no longer handle it.

Regards.

Jay



THEIR RESPONSE
Sent: 2/11/2010 06:04:52 PM
To: [Absent-Minded Jay]
Subject: RE: Chick-fil-A Web Form Message

Dear Mr. Jay:

Thank you for taking the time to contact Chick-fil-A. You are very important to us, and we appreciate your remarks regarding the 100% Columbian Coffee. We hope the following information will be helpful.

The new 100% Colombian Coffee will be replacing our current Café Blends Line (Coffeehouse Light, Bistro Dark, and Expressly Decaf)

100% Colombian Coffee is a premium coffee option that is more relevant to trends in coffee consumption than our current Café Blends line of coffees.

Thank you for taking the time to contact Chick-fil-A. Our customers are very important to us, and we appreciate you sharing your thoughts with us.

Your comments have been forwarded appropriately, and we hope to serve you in one of your local Chick-fil-A Restaurants soon.

Again, thank you for your time and interest in Chick-fil-A.

Sincerely,

Jay
Chick-fil-A CARES
Chick-fil-A...We Didn't Invent The Chicken,
Just The Chicken Sandwich.
On the Web at www.chick-fil-a.com



First of all, the dude that replied is named, "Jay." Ha!

Second, is it just me or does this sound like a canned response? Who cares if the Columbian Coffee is the going trend? Since when did a company become successful following a current trend instead of creating that trend itself?

Third, am I really important to them as a customer? If so, don't you think that they would have extended some apologetic suck up to me by offering a coupon for free item(s)? Do you really think they forwarded my concerns to the local restaurant? Do you think that location will really care?

Damn them! If their minis weren't so darn good with the honey-buttered bread over (basically) chicken nuggets. And if my kids didn't like their sandwiches and waffle fries so much, I would probably not eat their myself.

After all this, I will still continue to brew my own coffee because it always comes out the way I like it AND it costs much less in time, money and effort.

THE END


Live Long and Prosper!

NBA All-Star Game Dallas 2010

There was an article in the Dallas News that said something about Dirk. It was titled, "True to All-Star nature, Dirk Nowitzki's quiet with 22 points" (click here for the article while it lasts). Dirk opened the game with two attempts, two made, four points. It was a nice gesture to have the hometown hero start it off right. No pressure. Fast forward to the end of the game with something like 5 seconds left and who should have gotten the last attempt for the West? Yes, Dirk...in my opinion and just about everyone else's. Who took it? That dumb ass Carmelo! Why? Cuz he's a dumb ass! The game is on the line, the All-Star hometown hero has 22 points, hit or miss he should have finished the game just as he started it -- being the one to take the shot! Just my two cents but I think Dirk would have either tied it with a two-pointer or hit the three-point shot. Either way, I'm sure he wouldn't have come up short like that Carmelo guy.

So, onto the critique of the All-Star game.

If you Google the 2010 NBA All-Star game you'll get results that say what I posted as the title. What most people don't actually know (or probably don't care) is that the All-Star game was actually played in Arlington, Texas which is about 20-30 minutes outside of Dallas and Fort Worth but in between the two metroplexes.

Why then do they bill it as "in Dallas" or the logo even says, "Dallas 2010"? Is it because anybody outside say a 50-mile radius of DFW doesn't know where the hell Arlington is? Probably. But if I were the city of Arlington, I'd be feeling kind of gypped because a venue like this could have put them on the map...if only temporarily. The only thing(s) that were held in Dallas, mainly at the Dallas Convention Center, was the Friday-Saturday preliminary stuff like the celebrity game and jam session.

Anyway, semantics aside, I wanted to share my thoughts on the game. In a word, "LAME!"

I believe I've confessed a few times before that I really don't watch that much basketball anymore. I occasionally catch a few Mavs games but I don't make it a point to know what's going on in the NBA realm. That being said, as someone who isn't into basketball all that much, I think they could and should have made the game a little more interesting.

Let's go back one day before the game for the slam dunk contest. In two words, "VERY LAME!"

It was pretty cool how this 5'9" guy named Nate Robinson could dunk like Spud Webb (although I think Spud was much better) but there was no style, no grace, no form...no pizazz! It was actually pretty boring and I think the whole crowd (celebrity and non-celebrity alike) agreed. There were no "Oos," "Ahs," or "Ohs." As a non-fanatic, I should have been awed and wowed but I wasn't. Instead, I was almost yearning to see the Winter Olympics' curling competition as it would provide more excitement.

There's a reason they have basically nobodies in this competition because they don't want the really well-known players to get hurt doing something stupid like showboating and breaking a wrist or hand which meant they'd be out of the regular season games for however long.

I really wanted to see something like the following:I think you get the point. I think the difference between the dunks in the past and the 2010 participants is the height the players got allowed them to do just about anything they wanted while in the air. They seemed to be able to palm the ball much better as well.

Now back to the game, short and sweet, hopefully.

The All-Star game is supposed to be the showboating event of the year. It's the one time that whatever you do, hit or miss, win or lose, it doesn't really matter in the overall scheme of the NBA season. Sure you miss an arrogant shot or dunk here and there but who cares, it's supposed to be entertaining. What I saw was not that entertaining. There should have been almost nothing but slam dunks, alley oops, behind-the-back passes, and the like. Out of the first two periods, there was much excitement left to be desired.

The half time show was kind of lame too. I wasn't impressed with Shakira or Alicia Keys at all. Usher was good but I still wasn't given that BAM! feeling that would make me remember them after the night was over. In fact, I had to Google it to find out who did the halftime show because I just barely could remember Shakira.

I didn't get to catch the 3rd period and most of the 4th because I had to play taxi to some out-of-town relatives that drove from Illinois on Friday to attend only the game on Sunday. Their transmission was going out and they didn't want to drive it too much before they attempted to make the drive home on Monday.

Anyway, I did make it back just in time for the last couple of minutes of the 4th period and you already read my opinion on that at the start of this post.

So, the game has been done for a few days. More disappointment has settled in with the Mavericks losing to the Oklahoma Thunder City yesterday. I didn't even know where the hell the Thunder played out of much less that Oklahoma had an NBA team. To me, the Thunder is like the Toronto Raptors or Memphis Grizzlies: teams that "real" teams should never lose to or teams you never hear of making the playoffs. The Thunder was good enough to kick the Mavs' asses...which is utterly ridiculous whether the Mavs had new players or not. There's no excuse.

Days after the All-Star game has been completed, the only thing that stands out in the news is that the East won (which I hear is the norm) and it had a record attendance (which is a no-brainer since the Cowboys Stadium holds like a 100,000 people. It should set a record since no stadium comes close...yet).

Finally I think the city of Arlington did a great job hosting the event. While being taxi boy, I must say that there were a lot of police and security around the venue that people were able to safely walk around the stadium and the surrounding streets seemingly without fear of being threatened. They were very helpful to a few of the driver-bys that I saw as well as the pedestrians needing to get across the street. I was also surprised by the drivers around the area. They didn't do anything stupid like cut people off, speeding unnecessarily, or just being plain stupid. I truly believe that the city of Irving/Dallas would not have done as well as a job.

Okay, that is my take on the 2010 All-Star game as seen from the eyes of a driver-by and TV watcher.

Email humor 02/17/2010

This is just plain gross...but funny.




Live Long and Prosper!

Sunday, February 14, 2010

2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver, British Columbia

1st thoughts: The opening ceremonies sucked...in my opinion, my wife's opinion, my children's opinion, my wife's cousin's opinion, her cousin's husband's opinion, and their daughter's opinion.

The opening was too long. Too confusing. Too boring. Some of the graphics on the white floor and curtains was pretty cool but overall it was a dud.

I usually don't watch the opening ceremonies. There is a reason why. This was one of them. The only reason we did watch was because my wife's cousin and family was in town for the NBA All-Star Game (more on that game later).

Sad about the Georgian luger that died. I saw the video. Rough, very rough. 80-90 MPH into a column? I'd have to say near death if not dead upon impact. It's a dangerous sport to begin with but to be a non-test-driven course is just plain insane and irresponsible.

Anyway, I can't say I've made it a point to watch the Olympics this week. Nothing interests me except maybe the speed skating so far. Even the moguls was a little ho hum. I expected a little more pizazz on the jumps but was left wanting.

Hopefully, things will get more exciting and maybe hockey won't disappoint, if I have any time this week or next to watch any of the events.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Can you spot a crooked car salesman?


In case you can't, this is a good start!

My buddy and I pulled up to this Ford dealership and this man approached us.

We told him we were looking for the service entrance and he said, "Yeah, it is over there."

We said, "Thanks!"

He said, "Is there anything else you need?"

We said, "Nope. We are just looking for service."

He said, "Do you want to trade it in?"

We said, ""No! We just want to get the car looked at and probably serviced."

He finally said, "Okay, just drive around there and they'll take you right in for service."

Damn, is the car sales that low these days? If I WAS getting a car, I wouldn't buy it from this guy just because!

Sent on the Super Jay Network from Super Jay's BlackBerry®

Friday, February 12, 2010

Today's Woot!

Was browsing the web today and thought I'd check out the daily Woot!

I can't believe the price of these knives...and I'm assuming that since they are at Woot! they are sort of discounted.

I guess if the culinary arts is your profession or you have a lot of expendable dough to blow on a side passion, then I guess this isn't really that bad. I don't know about knives and shit for the cookers of the world but when I can buy a pretty, darn good computer for this price and the computer has way more overall, extended functionality...why buy this?

Again, some people will and have, just look at the buying stats here.


Thursday, February 11, 2010

Snow days are fun

My work closed at 3pm today. I got home and the kids and some of their friends on the street and I decided to play in the snow. This originally was going to be a wall but I got ambitious and decided I was going to try to make an igloo. It's not the best as we started out with a different set of plans and I changed them. I think it turned out alright though...a two-man igloo is impressive in my book, especially in Texas where I haven't seen snow like this since I was a kid. I started out with about four to five kids assisting me in my quest but I ended up doing it 97% by myself. It took me about 3 hours.



Email humor 02/11/2010

Apparently they didn't consider the sun when designing this wall.




Anyone want to take a guess where this wall is located?


SAINT PETER'S BASILICA


Live Long and Prosper!

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Domino's Pizza pt. 2

Okay, not to continually bag on Domino's Pizza but you cannot be serious. They must have polled people in po' dunk U.S.A. who don't know the difference between Sam's Club fried chicken and Bubba's fried chicken.

I'm sorry Domino's. I'm just not sold on your "new" recipe and all that. I do expect you to keep trying to impress though. It'll help keep pizza prices low.

By the way, Pizza Hut is running some weekly deals special right now. I love their chicken alfredo pasta. Ummm. I'm not so sold on 50 cents a wing but I guess that's the going rate these days.

Anyway, there's the food thought for the day.


No longer valid in "pop culture"

As a music artist, how do you know when you are no longer a valid fixture within the present pop culture?

When your old and gray? When you have no hair to turn gray (assuming you had hair to begin with)? When you are no longer recognized while in public? When you are referred to by some young, up-and-comer as their idol or the person they looked up to as a kid?

How about if you are on Amazon.com's 100 albums for $5 each list?

Email humor 02/09/2010




Live Long and Prosper!

Mavs Dancers Facebook

So, a few of my female Facebook friends posted to my wall, "Seriously?" when I became a fan of the Mavs Dancers.

Yes, I was influenced greatly by their profile picture and subsequent photos in their albums but c'mon. Look at this status they posted today. They just care about the world.

Brings a tear to my eye!


Live Long and Prosper!

Monday, February 08, 2010

Remington Dual Flex Cordless Shaver

I purchased the Remington Dual Flex Cordless Shaver at Walgreens on Sunday. I figured it was worth a try for $19.99 + tax.

I was able to take it for a test drive this morning. I'm making a u-turn and returning the product!

I hadn't shaven for a few days so my facial hair was anywhere from a quarter to half inch long. The shaver pulled the hairs. I found that if I didn't rotate or move the shaver quickly that it didn't pull as much. What's the point?! It did cut the hairs that it wasn't pulling as well as eventually the pulled ones but the pulling was sort of unneeded and unwarranted pain.

Besides the pulling, it also razor-burned or just plain nearly skinned me on my neck area near my Adam's apple. Not something I like to have done to my skin.

I think my Mach 3 shaves safer and better. I just mostly like the electric shavers overall.

I may return it or exchange it and pay the difference for another electric shaver. I don't recall what kind for sure but I believe I saw a Braun or Norelco for something like $60-$80. I don't know if I can do any worse. My only thing is that I think I want to try the rotary razors as all my electric shavers have all been the same kind of straight cutting or side-to-side action versus circular. I don't know if they are actually better or not but, again, it's worth the try.

So, there's my take on the Remington Dual Flex Cordless Shaver. I was looking for a cheaply priced decent working shaver and I didn't find it in this product.

Friday, February 05, 2010

Unlocked Apple iPhone for almost $900

I saw this in my "daily deals" email from Buy.com. I was kind of shocked and had to click the link to make sure I was seeing it correctly.

I was. Product link while it lasts.

I don't know why anyone would pay near $900 for a phone, even an iPhone. I guess the unlocked feature is great but that still limits the buyer to certain cellular providers (Sprint is out because it's not GSM).

I'm sure there is some needy dumb ass that will pay this amount. There always is. It reminds me a lot of when the PS3 came out selling for around $600-$800. People were putting theirs on eBay and bids were going to $1000+ because people really, REALLY wanted one. Suckers! That's why Americans are in debt...no self control, no self policing.

Just my thoughts. Enjoy!


Live Long and Prosper!

Are you a friend or an acquaintance?

I have a best friend. It's my wife. But I used to have this other best friend. In fact, I've probably had a few over my lifetime so far.

Some moved when we were young. Some we had very stupid adolescent fights, as stupid adolescents, and went our different ways (which I look back on and regret because the fights were so completely and insanely ridiculous!). Some we thought would be BFFs but for some reason, usually the other person's fault, it just didn't work out that way.

Truly, like Genie sings,
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend
You ain't never had a friend, never had a friend
You ain't never had a friend like me
You ain't never had a friend like me, hah!
That's just the way I am. Now I can't give riches but I can give undeniable, unsurpassable, loyalty with this friendship and I will help in anyway I can, if I can. I've pretty much always been that way. It's the way I was brought up and it's the way I think people should be. It also doesn't help that my children have made me more conscientious and broadened my moral fiber.

This doesn't come for free though. It doesn't have a monetary cost (although it could have a monetary value) but it does have a cost. All I ask is that I am treated with the same level of friendship. Now, this powerful friendship isn't for everyone that I know either. I don't expect my level from every friend and no one should.

I guess you could say I have levels of friends. Without actually thinking about it, there are those that I hang out with but wouldn't really invite them to a family get together or let them meet the wife and kids. We know each other. We just don't/won't enter another level of friendship because of whatever reason. Maybe the other person I have known since childhood and we've always been friends but they took a different path in adulthood and it just doesn't gel well with my path. I still consider them a friend but I can't jeopardize what I've built with whatever reason keeps us from hitting that next level whether it be drug or alcohol abuse or the company they keep outside of our friendship.

I think you can get the picture because I really don't have the time to think it fully through right now. I'm kind of typing this while at work, multitasking and I want to get to the point of the post. So...

I had this friend, let's call him SR. We've known each other since junior high, became better friends in high school, and became really good friends shortly after he graduated HS and attended college for almost two years. He's a year younger than me in age and in high school graduation.

Without getting into a lot of history, let's just say that our friendship has benefited him way more than it ever has me. I don't mean to count tit for tat but I don't think it can be described any better way. I'm not in a friendship because of what the other person can do for me monetarily or similarly-wise. I'm in it because I like the person, their personality, their friendship, the camaraderie, the similar likes and not-so-similar likes. But when the effort I put out is not reciprocated and it becomes a chore to maintain a relationship that is destined to fail, it's time to step away and reflect on why we are friends in the first place.

Again, not to count tits or tats, but my friend got a job at his current employer some 10+ years ago because of my wife. At the time, she worked in a department, told him about a job opening, edited his resume, prepped him and he applied with no experience and a long list of too-short-with job history. She was on the hiring/interviewing panel and pushed for others to give him a chance because even without experience he is quite trainable and likable and he would do a good job. He got the job (a very cush job) and he's been there ever since about 1996. This job came with tuition benefits as it was at a university whose benefits included free tuition for the employee (100% for undergrad up to a certain hours limit). It kind of makes up for the lower salary a university pays versus corporate America. Anyway, he was able to finish his undergrad degree over a few years' time.

In 1998, I got a job at the same university but in a different department on campus, the MBA admissions office, as an information systems guy. I got this on my own without anyone's help but my wife's, she did my resume.

Fast forward about 8 years. I gave my "friend" the inside track on when to apply for the Professional MBA (part-time) program. For anyone interested, it's the Spring term because it's tougher and a shorter recruitment time after seating a Fall term class. He needed the inside knowledge. He made something like a 460 on the GMAT. A 460 would get you into the University of Phoenix, maybe the University of Texas at Dallas or University of Dallas (I don't know for sure). The PMBA Admissions Director just happens to be my "hunting" buddy. So, to say that he got in on my recommendation wouldn't be far fetched. In fact, it would be right on fucking target! She told me that he's a nice guy but he's getting in strictly because I told her that he would be a good student even though he sucked ass on the GMAT. Anyway, even though SR hasn't done anything with his MBA he did complete it in the summer of 2008.

He kind of bailed on our friendship once his now wife got her hooks in him when they lived together as roommates. He'd make excuses all the time when he lived about 15-20 minutes away that he couldn't make it or had to break plans because she was/is uber needy. She wanted to trap his sorry ass and that's what she did but not trapped in the sense that she got pregnant. She just somehow got him suckered into her nasty web and has never let go. All of his friends see/saw it. In fact, his other best man (I was 1/2) told him straight up that he was settling and she is ugly now and she won't get any prettier over the years. LOL! Harsh, I know but way true. Anyway, we sporadically would do things. More like, he would come over (with the ball and chain) if it benefited him (basically, if I was grilling/cooking the food, he'd bring himself!).I got tired of that bullshit and nipped it in the bud quickly. I don't mind giving but I don't like being totally used either.

So anyway, to make a long post shorter, to show his awesome friendship, SR calls my cell phone three days before New Year's Eve 2009 and leaves a message saying something like this, "Hey dude, whatcha doin'? I was calling to see if you wanted to go to the Rock Opera at [inaudible] on New Year's Eve. I've got two tickets if you were interested in going. They aren't free of course. They are $80 each. You can go to the web site [blah, blah blah] to check it out. Anyway, the people that were going originally had something come up and now they can't go. We (he and his wife) thought of you guys (me and my wife) first. Give me a call and let me know."

I chuckled, got irritated, let the wife hear the message a few hours later and then sent him a text because I didn't feel like talking to him. I texted, "You should know me, bitch. Free maybe. $80 a piece. I don't think so! Thanks for the offer though." He replied, "I understand. But thought I'd ask." What a fuck stick!

Fast forward to approximately 6pm on December 31st, New Year's Eve. I get a text from SR, "Hey man, the tickets are free now if you are interested."

WTF?! Are you shitting me!? Are you really fucking serious?!

First of all, I have two kids. It's not like I can say, "Hey kids, Dad and Mom are going out on a last-minute notice on New Year's Eve to hang with their shitty friends where there will be tons of drunks out and about." Get real!

It was sort of sweet justification when he and I talked about a week later during a lunch outing. He said that they had to absorb the $160. Ha! The couple that was supposed to go offered to pay for the tickets anyway but SR thought he'd be able to recoup the money on his own telling his 'friend' that it's okay. WTF!? It's okay for this guy that he's known for about 3-4 years (he was also in the PMBA program the same time as SR).

SR can be cordial to this person but not to his so-called long-time friend Jay? Asshole!

Anyway, I was a gracious lunch guest. I told him what a dip shit he was thinking I'd pay $160 for those tickets when I find it hard pressed to spend that kind of dough on shit I like to do such as attend Stars or the occasional Mavs games. And he should know that.

After typing this, I had a thought about his wife. He and I are Facebook friends. His wife is on FB as I see her comment on our mutual FB friends statuses. She knows I am his and others FB friends and yet she has never sent me a friend request. I don't really care because I know some things she has done while they were dating and while they've been married. I don't approve of her actions and if he wasn't a dick before I would have probably informed him of these things. Funny thing is that he knows one thing she did about a year before they got married because he sort of walked in on it while it was happening and at some point felt compelled to tell me and the wife about it. Why I don't know as he still ended up marrying her.

People are just weird.

So, that's my story. It's got a lot of holes but I just don't have the time and energy right now to fully disclose. I mainly wanted to just share what an asshole he was leading up to New Year's Eve.

We've had a lot of good times and then he went stupid on us. Therefore, SR is now just an acquaintance instead of a friend. His loss, trust me.



Thursday, February 04, 2010

Email humor 02/04/2010

A new movie coming soon to a theater new you:

In the news 02/04/2010

Busy at work but didn't not want to share even though I can't comment fully on it right now.

From MSNBC:
LEGO My Gun: S.I. Boy Faced Suspension Over Tiny Toy

Click her for story while it lasts.

Really dumb! I think the definition of "toy gun" needs to be better defined so these stupid school principals don't make asses out of themselves. I mean really, look at the picture of the size of the toy that got this 9-yr-old boy in trouble. Stupid, really stupid!

On a lighter note. From the Frontburner:
A Soldier’s Last 24 Hours in Iraq

Click here for story while it lasts.

When I saw the title, I thought it was going to be a sad story. I'm glad it wasn't. I feel for the families of soldiers serving in a war. I commend them for giving themselves up for the possible betterment of others. I believe those that serve in combat deserve to be taken care of for the rest of their lives by the government. Sadly, the government seems to consider them disposable and yet they'll spend billions on the bank bailout and other ridiculous things.


Live Long and Prosper!

Jennifer's Body (2009)

I watched Jennifer's Body (2009) two nights ago. It wasn't that good of a movie but it also wasn't terrible.

It had it's moments like here but it never showed this which I assume must have been some secret behind-the-scenes-secretly-shot photo because it most definitely was not in the movie!

Anyway, the acting was sub par which is too bad because I really like that girl from Big Love and Mamma Mia!. Okay, I lust for her in a boobalicious kind of way...she's kind of cute too. Megan Fox is hot as well but she's hot in all her movies. She also has to depend on that hotness to get her through the acting world because she is not a professional at her chosen craft. She's not even close. Sometimes when I watch her in movies it's almost like she's looking at cue cards or some off-camera whatever that has captured her attention...you know, distracted. I don't see why directors let this go because if it's obvious to me it has to be to them. Do they overlook it because of her hotness will sell tickets whether her acting is good or not? I don't know. I'll rent for cheap her movies for her hotness but I won't pay $10 at the movie theater.

The story/plot was kind of weak. The part where Jennifer invites the Goth guy over her house and he ends up going to some weirdly, very dark street with no cars on it and no lights lit in the houses was lame. I mean, I'm all about getting the vajayjay but I've seen too many movies to be going to some place like he did based on the hopes of getting laid versus knowing I'm getting laid. Even with knowing, I probably would have kept on driving because I'm scared of the freaky, deeky, eerie, dark streets!

For a somewhat horror-type movie, they didn't show much of the horror. There were sheet shadows and quick glances of the "demon inside" but there were no good graphic, scary shots of this monster.

So, even with the occasional hotness of girl-on-girl deep french kissing, this movie is truly passable. I would have been just as entertained if I re-watched The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything. Yes, I've watched it once before...only once!

FINAL VERDICT: Pass! There's no real draw to endure this movie.


Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Basketball fouls are so subjective

I haven't watched, I mean really watched, professional basketball consistently in a long, long time. I would say the last time I made it a point to watch pro basketball games (I recorded many on VHS...remember those...and watch them later even after knowing who won) was when the Chicago Bulls won their first championship of the first three-peat.

I mention this because I wanted to show a knowledge of B-ball but reflect that this knowledge is probably outdated.

Anyhow, I am watching the Mavs vs. Warriors game and I see a lot of what I would call over-the-back fouls. Now, I'm sure there is some "real" rule that says there needs to be contact or something like that but the shit I have seen just in this game alone, makes me wonder if the refs even know what the foul is.

Some might say that the taller guy is reaching over the smaller guy. I'm not sure that's how it's going. I see a Warriors player jumping up behind a Mavs player (in what I would call obvious over-the-back) with a hand on the Mavs back or some definite body bumping but the refs don't call it. I mean really, when the player in front literally is slightly pushed forward a bit because the player behind them is reaching over them, I would think that's called OVER-THE-BACK!

This isn't a foul issue but I don't understand the coaching of the teams in the last few minutes of the game. Let's take this game again as an example.

Here's the scene set up: The Mavs are up like 101 to 92 with something like 2:25 left in the game Warriors have possession. Jason Kidd makes a steal at 2:22. He runs the ball to mid court and then launches a lunging pass towards Jason Terry who is near the top of the right-side of the arch at 2:19. The pass is picked off right at Jet's fingertips. The Warriors make a break back to the offensive zone and draw a foul from Jason Kidd at 2:12. Warrior player shoots and makes the two free throws. Mavs throw in and run the ball to the offensive zone at roughly 2:00. The 24-second shot clock is at about 19 seconds. One of the Mavs (I think it was Jet) takes and makes a shot (I think it was a 3-pointer) at 15 seconds on the shot clock and about 1:45 on the game clock. Score is 104-94. Warriors take it down and makes a 2-pointer. Mavs run back again and just barely make the 2-pt basket. Some way the game comes down to like 1:20 left and a 7-pt game.

I guess my point is why the hell the coaching staff on the leading team doesn't say, "Okay guys, we're up by 7 (or whatever). Work the shot and game clocks by getting the ball into the offensive zone, running down the clock and making our shot."

Instead, I've seen many seemingly wins turn into losses because they don't work the clocks. They take some dumb shit stick showboating shots and miss while the losing team makes their shots and before you know it, the game is tied and/or the losers are now the leaders and eventual winners in most games.

You see this in football when they run the clock, kind of like kneeling when you can. I just don't understand the mentality of wanting to shoot and shoot and shoot but you miss and miss and probably miss again. I've see a few where the point spread is like 10-12 points and somehow the losing team brings the pain and wins because of the stupidity and ignorance of the was-winning team.

I guess that's my rant. I've been intermittently typing this between watching the Mavs vs. Warriors, Ducks vs. Red Wings and whatever else can distract me so it may not be a cohesive though. Sue me!

Wee Man!

I don’t mean to sound rude and disrespectful but there is a little person on campus who every time I see him I want to yell, “Wee Man!”

It is not only because he’s a little person but also because he looks just like him!

Go Wee Man!

Sent on the Super Jay Network from Super Jay's BlackBerry®

#1 song on your birthday

More Facebook stuff that I don't really care to do on Facebook but I will share with my blogging fans...All zero of you.

The deal is to find out what the #1 song was when you were born. At first, I Googled and got one song. It was Want Ads by The Honey Cones. Apparently the web site I first visited wasn't detailed enough.

After further Googling, I visited a few web sites and they all agreed that the #1 song was I Feel The Earth Move/It's Too Late by Carole King. Apparently it was a sort of mix of the two or the sites merged the two songs since they were both the top of the charts during that time. I don't know. I'm claiming being a victim of believing whatever I read on the Internet because it has to be true since it's on the Internet.

While on the YouTube I saw some "related linkage" to a remake of I Feel The Earth Move by Martika. I kind of like her version because it's peppy, newer and she's just downright HOT! Funny thing, though, is that I always thought Martika was a one-hit wonder with Toy Soldiers. Shows you what I know.


Doppleganger

Who's Your Doppleganger was making the rounds on Facebook last week. I didn't get into it because I really just use FB to voyeur other people (without the seeing of sex acts or sexual organs...although there could be an app for that. HA!).

Anyway, I did find a picture of a couple of guys that she thinks I look like. I've heard more that Mike Tomlin looks like me (he's younger than me so he looks like me, right) than Omar Epps (I think just the wife thinks this). I can see the resemblance to Tomlin. Our eyes, cheeks, overall facial structure is similar, facial hair is similar where I sport the goatee/door knocker and his is more of a chin strap. I don't know why my wife/friends can't find a person of Asian descent or even White because I would think there are more look-a-likes there since I am Asian/White. I think my wife just has jungle fever.

I could have done worse with the look-a-likes, right?




Email humor 02/03/2010

A WOMAN'S POEM:
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep,
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long,
One who thinks before he speaks,
One who'll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he's rich and self-employed,
And when I spend, won't be annoyed.
Pull out my chair and hold my hand.
Massage my feet and help me stand.
Oh send a king to make me queen.
A man who loves to cook and clean.
I pray this man will love no other.
And relish visits with my mother.


A MAN'S POEM:
I pray for a deaf-mute gymnast nymphomaniac with
big tits who owns a bar on a golf course,
and loves to send me hunting, fishing and drinking. This
doesn't rhyme and I don't give a shit.



The Fishing Trip

Four friends spend weeks planning the perfect backwoods camping and fishing trip.

Two days before the group is to leave, Frank's wife puts her foot down and tells him he isn't going.

Frank's friends are very upset that he can't go, but what can they do.

Two days later, the three get to the camping site only to find Frank sitting there with a tent set up, firewood gathered, and fish cooking on the fire.

"Damn man! How long you been here, and how did you talk your wife into letting you go?"

"Well, I've been here since yesterday. Yesterday evening, I was sitting in my chair and my wife came up behind and put her hands over my eyes and said 'Guess who'?"

I pulled her hands off, and she was wearing a brand new see through nightie. She took my hand and took me to our bedroom. The room had two dozen candles and rose pedals all over. She had on the bed handcuffs and ropes!

She told me to tie and cuff her to the bed, and I did. And then she said, "Do whatever you want!"

So...here I am.


Live Long and Prosper!

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

I do have a heart

I was over on Wordpress looking at a "Freshly Pressed" post. The post is here.

I commented on the post but I didn't have the balls to submit my comment. Okay, I really did but I didn't want to.

My comment was really a rant. I think it was productive but it was also very opinionated and judgmental. Both things that I am and should have posted as such but then I started thinking. What if...

No particular "What if..." but any. My mind raced. My thoughts bounced here and there until I came to an epiphany (definition 3a-3). I thought, "I'll save this person from my ranting, berating, criticizing comment and post it on my blog instead."

So, read her post here and then relate it to my comment below:
I'm not a doctor but I play one (among other characters) in the show that goes on inside my head. Although I don't understand how parents give up or lose control, I don't judge (okay I do a little but that's just the way I am).

This is learned behavior. I assume that she knows you will clean it for her or eventually just "let it go." My kids occasionally do the same and I have to lay down the law: no TV, no computer, no phone, no friends over, no going anywhere, no nothing until the room is clean. It's amazing when you tell them they can't do the things THEY want to do how quickly they do the things YOU want them to do.

Kids need to be free but they need to know that there are guidelines that need to be met for this "freedom." I bet your daughter still enjoys her life, her friends, her whatever while being overwhelmed.

She clearly has a lot of clothing, a TV, and trinkets and things but she doesn't seem to appreciate them or you. Don't you think she could show a little respect to the people who allow and provide her the ability and means to enjoy life!?

I apologize if I come across harsh, condemning and judgmental. It just irks me to see this. I can't watch The SuperNanny or The Dog Whisperer without wanting to clobber a few mothers, fathers, and owners. I then want to slap me some kids or pets for being disrespectful and not appreciating the "pack leader(s)."

I just feel like I didn't decide to be a parent or pet owner to let them control me or for me to give up when they don't respect me. It frustrates me because I know I give everything for my family (pet included) and for them to not at least attempt the same, boils my blood.

Again, sorry for the rant. I'm sure your daughter is otherwise a wonderful kid as they all are. They just have these teeny, tiny little issues that should be obvious to them but aren't.


Monday, February 01, 2010

Is the email spam trying to subliminally tell me something?

I checked my email today and this is what my spam folder looked like. I have never used my email to sign up for ANYTHING. It is used strictly for comments notification on my blog.

Maybe I do need the little blue pill so I can "communicate" with Anastasya, Oksana, and Lynna (never been to Russia either but apparently they want them some Jay).

80% discount for me. It might be well worth a try.

When did Van Halen make this mix?

I am listening to an Internet radio station through Winamp called 181.fm - The Eagle (Classic Rock) -- I just realized it is classic and I was wondering earlier why I'm not hearing any newer stuff...now I know, duh!

Anyway, I just heard a song by Van Halen and the title was showing as Intruder/(Oh)Pretty Woman. I'm not a fanatic Van Halen fan but I never heard of this mix. Doesn't mean someone like a DJ didn't do it instead of the studio.

I just thought it was weird to hear those two songs mixed together.