Charmin Toilet Tissue

This evening the family and I went to Target to get some necessities...the main one being toilet tissue. One roll left for a family of four with two children that use more to wipe than their little asses will ever need is not going to last more than a day.

We are an economy-size family in the sense that I like to buy things like toilet tissue, paper towels, paper plates and such in a decent amount of supply at a reasonable price so I don't have to make too many trips to get more within a certain time period.

So, once at Target, the wife and kids go to look at clothes, swimsuits and stuff. I head to get the necessary toilet tissue purchase before I forget the whole (real) reason I went to Target. I get to the toilet tissue section of the aisle and I see Charmin Ultra Soft 30pk and Charmin Ultra Strong 30pk...both for $16.99. They are the double-ply I guess because it said something like, "30 rolls that seems like 60." What the hell ever! It's 30 rolls unless you ration the tissue squares and count them to know when you have reach the typical one roll.

I can't decide if I want "Soft" or "Strong." It really doesn't matter as they are both fairly soft to the touch and strong...it's not like I can do a "Bounty-test" to see what their strength difference is. One bag is blue and the other is red.

Oh the dilemma!

What decides it for me? If you look at the Charmin Ultra Soft in the blue packaging you will see under the description "Our Softest Touch & Most Absorbent" in smaller writing something to the extent of "Nuestro mas suave y mas absorbente." It's not exact as I can't remember it completely from the packaging so I used Babel Fish.

If these non-English speaking/reading Mexican mother fuckers can't understand something as simplistic as describing toilet paper, then why are manufacturers catering to their ignorance and enabling them to continue to be English illiterate?!?!?! I see it everywhere in everyday life...the grocery store, the gas station, McDonald's and Wendy's. Everywhere and I'm sick of it. Our melting pot of a nation should make English the official language of the United States and if you can't speak it, GET THE FUCK OUT! I believe I've mentioned it before but I don't think you see bilingual signs of German/English, Chinese/English or French/English in those countries. But in America, we cater to stupid fucks! It's the American way because it's not just the "foreigners" we hand hold but also the dumb ass "Americans" that are born and bred here.

I guess I'd better get off my podium.

That was the deciding factor though....Spanish "subtitles" or not and I went with not!